I’m not a loner type of person as I am used to living alone in the dorm since I was a teenager. I always believe that if I am sad, I can find outlets to be happy. However, living in Singapore for many years I experienced losing friends every 2-4 years depending on their work contract, and to attend a farewell party was a social norm. Have you heard about my Finnish friend Paivikki that I used to have lunch dates a few times a week? Well, she relocated to India with her husband and I missed our weekly dates and #OOTD shoots bonding. Have you heard about one of my closest friends Murielle? She is a good party host and the best BBQ French chef. Unfortunately, she is back in the South of France with her husband.
People indeed are growing apart. Why do they have to get married, have children and left me behind? Kidding.
After my closest friends left Singapore I am still not lonely as I diverted my attention to work, running a small business, and looking after a family. However, every human being needs genuine friendship that can give you positivity, consistency, and vulnerability. To have friends it gives you encouragement and support during times of life crisis and turbulence. If you find yourself going through a hard time, having a friend to support you can make the transition easier. To have friends it can keep you active and you will be engaging and productive. Having a good friend can give you a positive influence and they will help you improve your social functioning in general.
I am fortunate to meet Antonthe (I pronounce it as Anton-DA haha) at our common friends’ party some time ago. She reminds me of my teenage best friend Jennifer Rachel Tan (JR), a female rap artist, businesswoman, and model in Manila. Like JR, Antonette is gorgeous, feminine, bubbly, funny, thoughtful, caring, and a good listener. Her physical qualities and personality are just a few of the reasons why she is attractive to have friends. What makes her so special from others is that she will tell you in a brutal way if she has to be honest with you when you repeatedly make the same mistakes time and again. True friends or BFFs don’t believe in sugar-coating their words. Because the B actually stands for being “brutally” honest. Lol
What I truly like about her is that apart of being a natural sweetheart, Antonette is not a judgmental type of friend. I’m comfortable to tell her what is going on in my life without the fear that she may take my “little secrets or issues” against me. She comforted me when I was down and out in my relationship. She is not judgy and she is such an accepting type of person.
I also like that she can be a little crazy and funny. And we couldn’t be bothered to explain ourselves we just laugh at each other’s jokes and stories. If this isn’t true friendship, then I don’t what it is. haha.
There are many ladies who have applied to be my BFF but unfortunately, I don’t vibe with anyone and I am selective to my friends. I particular like friends who are emotionally stable because dealing with a bipolar is hard. It is like one day you are two cool together and the next day your story or little secret is published on her photo captions with nasty hints. I support mental health but let’s be frank, to deal with people with bipolar disorder is challenging. It means your friends come with emotional highs and lows.
Tips: Top 10 signs you’ve found a BFF.
1) She is not a judgmental bitch. If you don’t tell the whole story, she will get it and silences are never awkward. She gets it what are things can’t be shared and what are things you only trust to share with her.
2) You go for long periods of time without talking or seeing each other but can pick things up as though you’ve never been apart.
3) A true friend will never gossip about you behind your back.
4) You’re happy to share a room together without falling out.
5) You have private jokes only the two of you find funny.
6) Never goes after your crush or your ex. A true friend will never even flirt the guy you are dating.
7) They are accepting of your situation no matter how bad it is. They won’t make you feel low of yourself to make themselves look and feel better.
8) They would never put an unflattering picture of you on social media without your approval. Lol Any bitches that want to make you look bad in public is secretly a hater and disguising as a friend.
9) The only person they judge is the person you are dating or in a relationship with. She will keep an eye on him because she wouldn’t want you to get hurt (again). If she thinks something is off, she will be brutally honest about it because you blindly trust everything.
10) You can always move on from an argument as soon as it’s finished.
I have more tips but ladies, you need to figure it out your own. lol
To the darling Antonthe,
If ever you will take modeling as a profession, you are fit to be the cover girl for any Health Magazine (which is basically like the gluten-free community’s Vogue). I will read your interview about natural glam we all know you added a dash of highlighters from Anastasia Beverly Hills we can’t share about, and plus your golden voice in Alicia Keys’ songs in karaoke that’s such a winner in every house party. I’m so proud.
Not many people know one of the reasons why I hang out with you because I want to know about the brands you use for skinny teas and protein shakes you have been hiding for months. Whatever is the reason behind it, Beshy you look gorgeous and fit. Keep it up.
Thank you for loving me for who I am even most of my song choices are questionable and I was pitchy. You never have doubt in me but only questioned if I am truly a Filipino because I can’t hit the high notes in karaoke even though I told you many times I’m O’Connor and that’s self-explanatory. However, you liked my confidence, you never embarrass me at parties and you blame others whenever I can’t hit the high notes of Ariana Grande. The music is in the wrong key the whole time, you said. But I am so glad I made it work. You acknowledge my efforts and you are proud of my bravery to perform in front of our #superfriends despite having no talent in singing. Awww that’s love.
Apart from that, I enjoy your warm company and the 10% discount in the restaurant downstairs in your office (thank you, ah!). You gained my love and I feel confident to share with you my little secrets after signing an NCNDA with 10 years of renewable terms. However, I don’t fully trust legally binding contracts alone, hence we’ve moved on to pinky swears. So, I promise to be nice to you (subject when you don’t have a period), like all your photos on Facebook, and answer your questions on Whatsapp I usually charge clients for $3,000 for legal advice but for you is free. You can make it up with a glass or two of rosé chardonnay wine at Roberson Quay.
Even though I’m a lot older than you but we don’t see the age gap in our twinning photos (thanks to the Japanese collagen anti-aging milk I’ve been drinking since I was 20). To hang out with you it makes me more productive and engaging like an auntie in her early twenties. Awwwww. I am grateful to you who have watched me through all this time – the happiness, the goals, the secret wedding plans, and my failed gaming Youtube channel. I will forever cherish the memories and the people we have kicked out of our circle along the way.
I will be your lucky charm in case you will buy TOTO at NTUC, I will continue to glow for our twinning photos for Instagram, and I will be your personal lawyer who will send a cease and desist to anyone who will damage your reputation and hurt your brand.